Prayer request
Dear Family and Friends,
Its a pleasant sunday morning and I just finished unloading and loading the dishwasher while enjoying the views of a fall season over the lake. Nan was awake for a few minutes when I came down and mentioned that she had been awake a lot during the night with leg pains and burning feet. As I layed there and prayed I realized that I have not mentioned this pain issue to nor have I asked for prayer for it. For several weeks Nans feet often burn like fire and sometimes it goes up her legs as well. She longs to have them rubbed and I have come to realize after Jan was here how desperate Nan is to have some relief. I am doing a better job of rubbing her feet often and doing better at the actual process. The way I am made makes me very timid to try something that I might not be good at, which means I don't try most things in life because I am not really all that good at anything anymore. I used to be able to preach pretty decently but of course I only preach when I am driving alone these days and I used to be able to sing well but small little nodules in my voice box have put an end to that pretty much. I know how to work hard but often procrastinate in getting my work done or started. So I'm not to high on Tim these days. I know I face some big challenges right now and I'm not running from them, just feeling very confident either. In that light I have been reluctant to really do much in the way of massaging Nan's body and most recently her feet. But I have discovered that whatever I do seems to be a big help to her and to see relief on her face means everything.
I've got to admit I have no idea what God intends for us and for Nan. Why she has to go through such terrible ordeals is way beyond me. In the last three months we have moved from terrible rectum pain to gut pain, increased leaking which slowed the incision healing, leg pains, nausea, fevers, transfusions. The recovery since June 6 has been tough, so tough on nan that she is feeling the strain of the months passing and has come to a point where many of the normal things of life are no longer normal. She continues have a great inner strength but is much weaker emotionally than before. This is getting to her and I don't blame her one minutes for it. How could it not when every time you think you are making progress another intense pain begins, another health issue looms over you. If what we have always been taught that God does not allow more than we can bear is true, then it is about time for nan to catch a big break.
I am writing in the quiet of my office this morning to just ask you if you would take a moment and lay out before God what Nan is facing and ask Him to provide His answers, His healing, His comfort, His visible blessings. Nan is a very unique person, those of you who know her really well know that she does not talk about how she feels very often and you often will not even know what she is really thinking. She is intensely private with a strong Nelson will, loves to be indepentent, to be able to climb on a plane and travel to N. Carolina, Texas, Conn without explaining herself to anyone. She loves to be with safe people, those people who will not turn on her and has surrounded herself with some of the worlds most interesting and wonderful people, you all. But the Nan you think you know is very tired right now, tired of endless needles, hospital rooms, pains, bags and not knowing what is to happen next. If for any reason you have held off letting her know how you feel toward her in the past it might be time to let her know how you feel right now. In many ways her health is strong, yet she really needs all of our love and support right now. She is a beautiful and courageous woman who endures on any given day things that would make the rest of us cringe yet she does it all with dignity and steadfastness. When you call or send an email you are investing in a human being and your words are appreciated and treasured.
So this morning my altar call is this, please pray for Nan's painful feet and legs, for the uriter and illilal loop and for the leaking to be healed, for the terrible GIST tumors to be held in check, for the Gleevec to work in holding them back and for Nan to have peace with courage to battle on.
Thank you very much,
tim
Its a pleasant sunday morning and I just finished unloading and loading the dishwasher while enjoying the views of a fall season over the lake. Nan was awake for a few minutes when I came down and mentioned that she had been awake a lot during the night with leg pains and burning feet. As I layed there and prayed I realized that I have not mentioned this pain issue to nor have I asked for prayer for it. For several weeks Nans feet often burn like fire and sometimes it goes up her legs as well. She longs to have them rubbed and I have come to realize after Jan was here how desperate Nan is to have some relief. I am doing a better job of rubbing her feet often and doing better at the actual process. The way I am made makes me very timid to try something that I might not be good at, which means I don't try most things in life because I am not really all that good at anything anymore. I used to be able to preach pretty decently but of course I only preach when I am driving alone these days and I used to be able to sing well but small little nodules in my voice box have put an end to that pretty much. I know how to work hard but often procrastinate in getting my work done or started. So I'm not to high on Tim these days. I know I face some big challenges right now and I'm not running from them, just feeling very confident either. In that light I have been reluctant to really do much in the way of massaging Nan's body and most recently her feet. But I have discovered that whatever I do seems to be a big help to her and to see relief on her face means everything.
I've got to admit I have no idea what God intends for us and for Nan. Why she has to go through such terrible ordeals is way beyond me. In the last three months we have moved from terrible rectum pain to gut pain, increased leaking which slowed the incision healing, leg pains, nausea, fevers, transfusions. The recovery since June 6 has been tough, so tough on nan that she is feeling the strain of the months passing and has come to a point where many of the normal things of life are no longer normal. She continues have a great inner strength but is much weaker emotionally than before. This is getting to her and I don't blame her one minutes for it. How could it not when every time you think you are making progress another intense pain begins, another health issue looms over you. If what we have always been taught that God does not allow more than we can bear is true, then it is about time for nan to catch a big break.
I am writing in the quiet of my office this morning to just ask you if you would take a moment and lay out before God what Nan is facing and ask Him to provide His answers, His healing, His comfort, His visible blessings. Nan is a very unique person, those of you who know her really well know that she does not talk about how she feels very often and you often will not even know what she is really thinking. She is intensely private with a strong Nelson will, loves to be indepentent, to be able to climb on a plane and travel to N. Carolina, Texas, Conn without explaining herself to anyone. She loves to be with safe people, those people who will not turn on her and has surrounded herself with some of the worlds most interesting and wonderful people, you all. But the Nan you think you know is very tired right now, tired of endless needles, hospital rooms, pains, bags and not knowing what is to happen next. If for any reason you have held off letting her know how you feel toward her in the past it might be time to let her know how you feel right now. In many ways her health is strong, yet she really needs all of our love and support right now. She is a beautiful and courageous woman who endures on any given day things that would make the rest of us cringe yet she does it all with dignity and steadfastness. When you call or send an email you are investing in a human being and your words are appreciated and treasured.
So this morning my altar call is this, please pray for Nan's painful feet and legs, for the uriter and illilal loop and for the leaking to be healed, for the terrible GIST tumors to be held in check, for the Gleevec to work in holding them back and for Nan to have peace with courage to battle on.
Thank you very much,
tim
posted by Tim Mustard @ 7:51 AM
2 Comments:
At 2:29 PM,
Anonymous said…
Tim ~
You love our Nan so much and this blog really expresses it. Now, when the tears clear, I'll only say one thing.
We don't know what the future holds, but we know Who holds the future.
Courage, love and prayers to you and our dear Nan, Marilyn
At 2:44 PM,
Anonymous said…
It's evening here in NC already. The sun is setting and the air is a crisp 45 degrees. This morning it was 24 degrees. Needles to say the flowers are no longer flowers ~ just a black puddle of stuff.
Tim, all those things are still in you. They are just on hold for now. Your full time focus has been on Nan and her needs. You have done a valiant job of being there for her and ministering to her needs ~ even foot rubs. Don't be too hard on yourself. We know you can preach. Your heart just isn't in it right now. You have a gift of saying a lot in a few words in your sermons. People remember what you say. Your body, soul and spirit are tired. God is with you even when you don't feel His presence. That's what your friends are for to lift you up in prayer when you are too tired yourself.
As you said, "God does not allow more than we can bear". All I can say is God must trust you a lot with the trials and He will be by your side. He knows you will be faithful. Remember Job? I don't think he liked the trials much, but was blessed many times over in the end. Your turn will come some day.
Keep up your courage. You have a tremendous chain of prayer warriors praying for you both. I know He hears and will answer in His way and in His time. It has been said, "When you come to the end of your rope ~ tie a knot and hang on!"
Continued love and prayers ~ Carol
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