Monday morning - what is to come?

Dear Friends and Family,

Its monday morning, Nan is in deep sleep right now due to the premedicating. She is allergic to the idodine contrast they will use today to try to find the leak. Benedryl and pretisone are given in advance which offsets her reaction. We have done this for years but she is enjoying a deep sleep as a result. I am happy to see her sleep knowing what is ahead for her today. My heart is so troubled as I anticipate yet another day of sitting in waiting rooms and standing in the hall as these procedures are done to the one I have loved for 37 years. Truely there is no one in the world like Nan, the better you know her the more you will agree with that comment. She is wonderful mixture of steel, satin, humor, gentleness, dedication, loveliness, energy, excitement, compassion. She is deep and careful, she is the ultimate good friend and can keep secrets forever safe in her heart. Our entire family has been guided and loved by her through the years and she is like no one else.

I remember when we were first married how she would help me, I would get excited and talk too loud and too much at parties or gettogethers. I would feel her soft hand on my knee and if I ignored it then it would begin to grip harder and harder until I realized my behavior needed changing. No one else ever knew but in this gentle way she helped me rein in my enthusiasm and let others speak. It is vintage Nan, caring without drawing any attention to herself at all.

So today we face yet another chapter in our long battle with GIST. It has been said that when one person in the family has cancer the whole family is effected. As I look back over the past 10 years I once again realize how precious our family and extended family is. Our children and their spouses have been as solid as rocks in their support and love to us. They have faced this cancer with determination and constant love and involvement. How we treasure them and their constant expressions of love and support. Like Steve and Keanna popping in the other night after the zoo. No one told them they had to do that but it made a big difference in how Nan felt as she drifted off to sleep. Jo's gift of the cashmere scarf, Nan has it here at the hospital with her, she loves it. Nikki's calls, her dropping in to fix dinner, her buying special treats for me to eat when I'm out traveling and the beautiful photo albums and exciting pictures of Keanna. Jason keeping Nan up to date on what is happening at MBA, his surprise visits when he can get away, his orchids. Sharon and Dana traveling across the country to be with Nan over and over again, daily phone calls. They make a big difference. There is Aunt Ann, our prayer warrior with calls and emails, Nan loves her and appreciates her so much. Calls from David, Joe make the time pass and are a delight to her. There is Mary from travel, with a heart of love, Pam, her long time friend and frequent hospital visitor, Irene her newer friend and fellow GISTer who has gone all out to help Nan in every way and so many more of you who let her know you are praying for her. Roxanna and Rick who live in Conn. have been wonderful support and Nan enjoys hearing from her often. Then there is Loree who carries a heavy load for the business while we are away, we could not survive without her and Ken and Leann who watch over things and help with the books. We are very blessed.

We have our special friends in N Carolina Roger and Carol and special friends in Lodi Bob and Carrol. Nan reads every message they send to the blog and is lifteded by it.

We have no idea what this day will bring but after over a week of inaction in Concord we are thankful is a scared way to finally have something be done. Scared because there are always chances of things going wrong, scared because perhaps the fix is not possible or the leak is too hidden to find. Scared because todays CT scans may show more tumor growth. Nothing is certain today but we will face it like we have faced everything else holding each others hands, like Nan said the morning she got up and drove me to the hospital ER, we are a team. Please pray that this team can have a win today, not a shutout.

I will try to blog when I can today, I have no idea of schedule today but will be here as long as I can before having to race home and sign the tax filing. Then back here again.

Can you please just stop and pray a simple prayer for God's guidance and healing today for Nan.
We thank you very much,

love

tim and nan

ps Jan, we'd love to have you come visit anytime you can!!