Nan Mustard's Recovery

This blog is a record of Erin (Nan) Mustard's recovery.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

One week of peace and rest

Dear Friends and Family,

Today marks the one week mark since Nan passed to her rest. One week without constant fear and trauma, one week without bleeding, pain and suffering. On a mental level I am so relieved that Nan is beyond the battle she fought so bravely, on a emotional level I still expect her to come around the corner or be in her chair greeting me.

I'm making decisions right now that wise friends and family have said I need to make, go back to work, keep busy, be with family, talk to supporting friends. Today has been a day like that.

Last night I returned to my bed upstairs. It was a very rough night. I had slept in the chair for so long that my body had no interest in being in a bed flat, after a few hours my back woke me with pain, and it was too hot, then with the window opened it was too cold, the bed was too hard or too soft. I kept adjusting the numbers, finally at 1:30 I decided to come downstairs and reclaim the chair but then I feel asleep for a longer period of time but at 7 am I was up and showering, enough pain in that bed. It will be better tonight, I'll start out with the windows open for cool air.

We have received dozens and dozens of cards over the past few days. Today I opened one from Dr. Melynk, Nan's oncologist. It reads: Dear Tim, On behalf of all the doctors, nurses and staff at East Bay Oncology, I wish to extend our most heartfelt condolences on the pass of Erin. I can unequivocally state that I have never known anyone more determined to overcome their disease; Erin will always remain a true inspiration for us all. She will be sorely missed. With deepest sympathy, Ostap Melynk M.D."

Dr. Melynk was her oncologist for the entire 11 years she battled GIST and learned a great deal about the disease during that time. He was always willing to talk to MD Anderson in Houston to experts on the disease and helped us through it all. He has only had one other GIST patient and that was for a brief time. What he said was true. Nan pursued life where ever the search led and I was along to make her quest happen.

This evening we had dinner at the local steak house to celebrate Steve's 34 birthday. His brother David joined us as did Marilyn. We really had an enjoyable time together.

I went back to work today and saw 2 properties in Oakland. Both ladies were aware of our loss and we talked a bit about it, I was able to show a photo of Nan and Starr. They were very kind and supportive.

It feels very strange at times to be going about my life in a normal manner considering the loss we have experienced yet I have to located and assume a new normal that God is leading me into. I can hardly believe what has happened and have to remind myself often that in fact it has happened. This morning just as I was set to leave I came across photos I had taken at the viewing at the mortuary. That was a tough moment and it took a bit to recover. It was like a walk back in time she looked so lovely and healthy there.

Jason has invited me to give a presentation about the appraisal world at career day on Sunday at MBA. I'll drive down on Friday and stay the weekend. It will be nice to get a change of location. Marilyn is set to visit her friend Diane in Sacramento. Steve and Nikki are flying to Hawaii on the 15Th to begin to enjoy a warmer situation. I will join them on the night of the 24Th and now I have a place to stay in Kauai, Nikki found the last room they had and there is even a chance I might get to stay at the Hyatt since a family friend has a crew working there. That would be very exciting, we will have to see what develops. No matter what I will enjoy watching Timothy so Jason and Jo can explore, hike and enjoy the warm water and air. I can't quite believe that I am going, it is like a very nice dream, one I had hoped for but had no idea how I could make it happen at this moment and then it was laid on me, thanks!

I am thankful that there is a lot of work right now to get done, helps keep me going.

My heart really goes out to those people in the mid west who are having ice storms, lost power and misery. I've seen some ice storms before and they are terrible. Sunny California seems pretty good right now in spite of the cold.

Thank you for the DVD requests and we will have them as soon as the little shop in Tracy can handle it. They are having their own personal crisis right now and we can certainly wait until they are doing better. George is helping so much with everything.

Just let me know if you want them and include a mailing address, I've started a file for the requests.

So my family, my friends, thank you for your support over the past 24 hours. I never feel alone because of you.


tim and marilyn


  • At 11:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Wow that was a great story in the blog today. It reminds me of that classic story from olden times. The one with that girl, what's her name, and those 3 characters with the fur coats. Something about paridge(sp)! Your version was a little different.

    The bed was too hot
    The room was too cold
    The bed was too hard or too soft
    So I came down the stairs to fix
    What was the matter
    And slept soundly on the chair
    For that was what really mattered!

    Good morning and welcome to the rest of you life. The one full of family, friends and new adventures. Rejoice and be glad in it.


    ps come to dinner any time and bring that wonderful Marilyn lady with you if she is available

  • At 9:31 AM, Anonymous Bob & Carrol said…

    Hi Tim & Marilyn,

    We are glad to read that You are moving forward with Your Life & Business. Simple Annaversaries will come and go the next Months, Weeks, Days; etc & with each one grief will sweep over You but as time goes on the crush of emotion will slowly began to subside.

    Today marks the 6th year that We recieved the call from San Francisco that Our Dear Son Rick was not going to be Home with Us for Christmas as was planned. only 30 short days later He was gone and We still keenly feel the loss but are learning to deal with it and go to thinking of that grand reunion day that We all long for .

    Have a good day and know that We are thinking of & Praying for You & Your Family.

    Bob & Carrol.

  • At 9:22 PM, Anonymous Conners said…

    Hi Tim,
    Just wanted you to know I read all the blogs since the beautiful memorial service on Sabbath. I just got home from choir practice. Glen had to fill in for the 5-11 shift tonight because someone was sick, so he missed our last practice before we sing Sabbath for church. Maybe you can join us for our future practice session on January 8! I am glad you will get to be in Hawaii with the kids for Christmas. How fun! Can you send us your e-mail address again? My computer gave up, and Glen doesn't have e-mails stored in the address book. You can reach us at We are thinking of you many times a day and praying for you to feel God's special presence beside you during this difficult transition time.


    Joyce (and Glen!)

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