Rough day

Dear Friends and Family,
Nan slept well last night but woke to a busted colostomy bag this morning about 7 am. So we changed the sheets, she quickly changed the bag and then fell back asleep. The wound care nurse came at 10:30 and changed the nephrostomy dressings but left quickly since she was suffering from a cold.
The money situation really set in today as we tried to stretch the funds we have to cover the needs. I also was facing writing a rebuttal to a review of an appraisal I did on a very high value home in Pleasanton. It seemed no matter what I tried whether it was reaching agents and brokers, or running data, nothing worked out right. I ended up leaving Nan upstairs for hours thinking that she would let me know when she was ready to come down and she was not wanting to disturb me on a very tough day of seemingly endless defeat. Finally we touched bases and I helped her come down to her chair. We decided to exercise a disability policy we have on one of our high balance credit cards since the card is in Nan's name. We had no idea that they would freeze the card immediatelly and not allow any charges to be made while they are researching the disability claim, so good news, no payment needs to be made on the card this month, bad news it removed one of Nan's last emergency options if we needed something and didn't have the funds. It brought Nan to tears realizing that she was even more limited in her options than before. And having Nan in tears is very hard for me to take, it made me feel even more inadequate than the rest of the day. Here is this brave woman who does everything she can to help out and she gets a door slammed in her face. It may work out fine but today things just felt really tough for both of us.
The one bright spot in the day was when Nikki and Keanna came to have dinner. nan unhooked from TPN and hydration for a few minutes and went to the kitchen and prepared a delicious meal. It was great. When she got back to her chair she took her blood pressure and it was a good reading but her pulse showed at 50 the first time we took it, later it was 75 which for Nan is still very low. Not sure if the machine is not working right or her heart is beginning to enjoy the full hydration and is beating slower than the 100 to 115 of the last year. We know that we are reaching full saturation for Nan, urine is more clear and there is more of it now.
Some money came in the mail today but not enough to cover AMEX, tomorrow house payment and other smaller bills. We are just feeling like our back is against the wall right now and we are not sure where to turn.
This evening Nan helped me work out appointments for the rest of the week and the first of next week. We are trying to work up a schedule which gets me home earlier in the evening so we can have some time to relax and get to bed earlier than the past few weeks. I'm getting worn down and it sort of frightens me. It was so nice of nan to help with the appointments, that way she knows what is happening and when to plan on me being home. Tomorrow I drive to Patterson for a construction inspection, then to Martinez, Antioch and then Brentwood before coming home again.
Keanna was in fine form tonight, she insisted we play high and seek and then she put on a puppet show in the living room, tonight the puppets were eating the guests attending the show. Then all too soon it was time for she and Nikki to climb into the accord and head home to bath and sleep. What an absolute blessing it is for both nan and me to have Keanna and Nikki come to visit. Steve came earlier in the day too with Meleboo to check on work and to help out. Jason called twice as he was traveling home from Salt Lake City thru Vegas to San Jose from a working trip. I guess together we will make it through all of these challenges.

We certainly need your prayers tonight, for Nan's recovery and for God's help with finances. Seems everyone in the county need to be paid, that is except us!

Thank you for your understanding and love,

tim and nan