Nan Mustard's Recovery

This blog is a record of Erin (Nan) Mustard's recovery.

Saturday, September 30, 2006

Rough day - seeking relief

Dear Freinds, Family and Fellow Gisters,

This is a sad evening here in our family room. Nan is once again very ill. She is vomiting nearly comstantly this evening. She had made it from yesterday morning all through the day and the night before becoming ill today again. This afternoon she developed a headache so severe that it seemed to trigger the vomiting and since then it has been nearly constant. It is so frustrating to me personally to see Nan in such distress without being able to solve her problems. It is rare when she is so sick that she can't sleep yet that was the case late this afternoon. I was in the office and she called me on the intercom system, "come get me" was all she said. I wasn't sure if we were on our way to ER or what. She meant she needed help as she had thrown up, her little basin was full and she wanted to come down to her chair so thats what we did, came down. She settled into her chair but was too hot, too cold, and then started to throw up over and over. We tried a popsickle but that came back up along with the water and her toe nails I think.

Nikki called this morning and mom was doing pretty well and resting in bed so I went over and we took Keanna to Sabbath School in Tracy, Keanna was so cute today in her pretty dress and her hair was lovely. She enjoyed SS and seeing her friends and Nikki and I had a moment to bring our many church friends up to date on Nan's transfusion and general condition. Then we headed home stopping in a punkin patch for photos and to select one for Nikkis front porch. Keanna and Nikki agreed on a small but attractive one. Then I came home to find Nan doing pretty well. The wound care nurse came and replaced the wound sponge and installed a new dressing lock for Nan's nephrostomy. The tube had come completely lose and was slipping in and out of Nan's back without any restraint. When we discovered it we threw on a tagoderm to hold things in place until the nurse could come. After the nurse left our friends Bob and Carol arrived from Lodi. They did not come empty handed and brought a sugar free Marie Calendar apple pie and they even brought their own ice cream. It was very good and we all enjoyed a piece. Bob sure knows his way around the kitchen and left things clean and in good shape. We enjoyed our time with Bob and Carol so much and know that as of monday Carol faces another round of chemo, 28 days have passed already. They shared their photos of their Tahoe trip on the steam wheeler which takes a beautiful trip out onto the Lake and into Emerald Bay and back. We are so glad they got to take the Tahoe trip and spend a few days there in perfect weather. Last year we did the same thing and loved it on the lake.

Finally since I have started doing this blog Nan has fallen asleep on the couch. I was praying for God to help her, I dread the night, I just hope she can rest comfortably tonight. Not knowing what to do to help her I decided to start the hydration bag of saline and her next TPN a little early so right now both the TPN and the hydration bag are going in and she is resting quietly under two blankets and on about 5 pillows. She has a dog show on and the noise of the TV helps her sleep. One thing of note today was the canister on her wound vac lasted 27 hours and had only about 150 ml of fluid instead of 300 yesterday in that time period. On monday they will take a sample of the fluid to see what is going on with the wound. I think there are things going on inside that we do not understand, something does not want any food or water in her stomach tonight. During the day she has had a full bottle of water and another one during the night. This afternoon her temp was only 96 or 97 per the nurse.

Another interesting wrinkle in our current life situation is that our clothes washer has taken a dive, won't turn the agitator around now, will pump water in and out but makes a nasty sound. My first temptation is to dive in and tear it apart and attempt a fix. However I have about 9 appraisals to write and complete and it makes more sense for me to do what I do and let a service person do what they do. If the costs of repair are too high then we will consider buying a new one. This one is a Kenmore and has lots of years on it and its been faithful over the years but what a time for it to fail!! I've given some thought to the idea that God only allows what we can handle and that pressure builds deeper faith, so far I have my doubts but I do thank God every morning for another day for both of us, that we get to see Keanna, Nikki and Steve, that we get to celebrate Jason's birthday with he and Jo, that we have many blessings in spite of the extreme challenges we face.

After sundown tonight I waded into the stack of bills writing some checks as I could. Some money came in the mail today for which we are thankful. This coming week will be interesting since Loree is vacationing with her family on a houseboat on Lake Shasta so I'll be doing a bunch of call forwarding to my cell and trying to use my time as wisely as I can. I can only pray that Nan's health will improve to the point that I can be away part of the day since I have many appraisal orders to complete all over northern California. It will be an interesting week. Should any of you want to visit with Nan on any day please fee free to call and let us know. When Sylvia came on thursday Nan had a much better day than she would of otherwise. People do make a big difference for sure.

Providing Nan feels better tomorrow I will work very hard at my desk writing appraisals and try to catch up a bit. Our clients are patient but they can only wait so long for the finished appraisal or it hurts the homeowners loan.

I am finding myself nodding off as I write, I think I forgot to eat dinner tonight but the apple pie and ice cream was sure good this afternoon. I've got the dishes washed, the living room less cluttered, the medical supplies sorted and will park the bug back in the garage for the night. Now if Nan can just feel better, oh how I enjoy the minutes when she feels good. Someone mentioned today that from reading the blog they can follow our ups and downs. Well that is certainly true to life. Yesterday as we drove home from Concord and the hospital Nan felt good, had some burrito, enjoyed the evening with Pam and slept well last night. Now this evening things have turned rough again. I can only pray that Nan will be able to sleep well tonight.

Bob and Carrol brought us up to date on their friend who has been recovering from lung surgery for the past 3 weeks and finally he is doing better. He is still in the hospital but making some progress. Roger, our friend in N. Carolina who is recovering from a heart attack, is back on the roof cleaning gutters much to Carol's dismay. We continue to hope and pray for full recovery for Nan too.

We once again would like to express our gratitude to each of you for your prayers, for your emails, your expressions of support and for keeping Nan in your mind.

We send our love,

tim and nan

Friday, September 29, 2006

New blood makes a great positive difference

Dear Friends and Family,

Friday evening at about 11:10 pm. Nan has just gone up to bed with a fresh TPN bag and a lot more energy than this morning. We have enjoyed our evening visiting with Pam, Nan's long time friend from Lodi. She was kind enough to drive over this evening in spite of the nasty levee roads and shared her evening with us. It was so nice to relax with a friend and to have Nan feeling so much better than even this morning. Thank you Pam for your wonderful visit.

This morning started with Nan vomiting three different time between 5 and 8:30. She felt so rough when she dressed to travel to the hospital for blood. She rode in the bed in the back but felt every sudden stop and every bump the entire way there. We have a 110 outlet in the back of the Odyssey so can plug in the vacuum pump as we travel. She bundled up with blankets and pillows to keep warm. Finally we arrived at the Concord Campus of John Muir Hospital and we went to short stay on the third floor. The nurse was ready for her and got started immediatelly. I asked about extra hydration but was told the they would be giving lasix. However the lady oncology Dr. came over during the morning and went over several ideas to help Nan. 1) stop the Lovequin 2) put a patch behind her ear which is usually used for sea sickness on cruise ships (very creative solution) 3) extra liter of hydration to be given along with the TPN for the next few days. Nan started to slowly feel better after the 1st unit of blood was in. Of course the little steriod they give always gives her a bit of energy so as the day progressed her phone calls became more and more animated and alert. I drove from Concord to Waterford which is about 1.5 hour trip and inspected a nice home with delightful people. Then back to Taco Bell for a wholesome lunch, then on the Ripon to another lovely home and great owners. Then back to Tracy where Nan had me stop and pick up a burrito from her favorite place, this is the same lady that has not been able to eat or drink almost anything and keep it down over the past few days. I made the stop and used a card some kind person slipped me in church at ARCO and filled the tank of her car, then on to Concord to pick her up. It was like seeing a new person, a bit more color in the cheeks, a full rounded voice and quick movements. We loaded up the wheel chair with the pump, the TPN bag, the purse,a nice pick bucket just in case. When we got to the car she decided she wanted to ride up front. We had a nice ride home and got to talk to Nikki and Keanna, Pam Whitted and Sharon. We got home and few minutes later Pam arrived and we relaxed. nan had two mocha hot drinks, water and enjoyed her recliner. We tried to get Pam to just stay over in the guest room but she needed to get back.

I managed to forget to prime the line of the TPN and Nan looked down with alarm at the clear air filled tubing at about the same time as the pump started beeping telling me there was air in the line, stupid care giver, need to be more careful!! We primed the line and then everything worked fine.

As I reflect on the past week it has been a time of conflicting emotions, seeing Nan so sick on so many different occasions this week has been very tough, she has suffered not so much from the lower back pain but from pain in her incision wound where the vac sponge is and ongoing nausea which even Zophram did not touch. The low hemoglobin certainly has not helped at all. We have been in a circle of distress. We were taking the antibiotic every night which usually causes some GI problems and vomiting, with vomiting she was losing more fluids than she could replace so she became dehydrated which caused creatins to rise to 3, highest since Boston and high creatins cause vomiting and nausea. Complicating things is the high output of fluid into the canister of the vac pump from the incision wound, about 300 cc a day, fluids that need to be replaced somehow. As we go to sleep tonight I think we have a handle of solving some of these problems. Nan feels much better this evening, the best she has felt for several days.

We were thinking about a week ago. We were in the motorhome at Jason and Jo's place and we enjoyed our time there so much with them and having Sharon along to keep us sane. We thank God He has helped us through this week and we thank him for sending Sharon, Mary, Pam, Sylvia and for my friend Art and my brother who are my phone buddies. Steve, our son in law has also been great about dropping in with Keanna and seeing what is going on, Nikki with her visits and kind calls. We are blessed in so many ways. Dana too has been a great phone buddy for Nan and had good news this week at MD Anderson regarding the health issues around her knee and leg.

Bob and Carrol have a long time friend who is recovering from a very tough surgery in Lodi and has been struggling with the aftermath of surgery for about three weeks now. We sure want to remember him in our prayers.

If it works out I may get to take Keanna to Sabbath School in the morning, I love to do that when I can. Right now I believe I'll go to sleep. Long week, many stressful moments, many blessings received, treasured moments with the woman I love.

Please keep us in your prayers and also express some thankyous for His continual watching over His children.


tim and nan


We sure hope to see people tomorrow, come if you can, we'd love to see you.

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Thursday and blood is on its way

Dear Friends and Family,

8:25 Nan is resting and watching CSI Las Vegas. She is getting her Lovequin now and only two more nights and then she will be done with this round. We are looking forward to her being off the Lovequin and hope her GI can start to function more normally.

We experienced the ultimate in kindness this morning. As you might remember last night the blood bank was requesting additional blood to track down an antibody in Nan's blood. The type and cross could not be completed due to lack of enough blood in the sample we gave yesterday. ERRRR. They wanted us to drive back in again last night and do another sample. Nan was not up to an additional 3 hours of travel. We went round and round with the blood bank. Finally I decided to try to ask our visiting nurse if she might be able to come and take a sample and then I could drive it in. She was more than willing and came about 6:30 this morning, took the sample and then drove it to Concord and the lab as a courtesy. What an act of love that was. Later today the hospital called and confirmed they had the blood ready and Nan could have the transfusion on friday. So tomorow morning we drive to Concord for the transfusion. I won't be able to stay with Nan this time as I have appointments in Modesto and Escalon but then I will head back and pick her up from the hospital. Nan is looking forward to this day at the hospital, she is really ready for some new blood. Hopefully they will give her some extra fluids too to make up for what she has been losing through the throwing up.

Today Sylvia came to spend the day with Nan. She arrived about when I was leaving for Daly City and she and Nan had a good day. They played games, had to call Sharon to learn some of the rules, Nan had a couple hot drinks, watermelon, drank water and spent the whole day doing things. At about the time I got home Syliva was leaving and Nan had just moved upstairs so she could rest. When I came up to let her know I was home she was very much asleep. Later she called me on the intercom to remind me of the Lovequin. Sylvia was a great help today and really made the day liveable for Nan. Plus Syliva brought some very yummy food which ended up being my dinner tonight. Thanks, thanks, thanks.

Please remember Nan in your prayers this evening. Concerns include: fluids from the incision continue to flow, creatin levels are up, hydration is down, blood sugar levels are up some, vomiting several times a day and night, low hemoglobin.

Thanks for your caring and your prayers.

We heard from Sharon today and she is safely back at work and rested. It seems our week went so fast that she was here, way to fast. Now we miss her.

Hope to see you soon,


tim and nan

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Resting after a stress filled day

Dear Friends and Family,

I am blogging earlier than usual because I find myself unable to think clearly by the time I normally write to you. As I write from my office Nan is resting in her Sleep by Number bed directly above my ceiling. Our day started with her being sick which she has been a lot lately. I came down and worked and she was able to sleep some more but she called around 8 and I helped her come downstairs. We sipped hot drinks and in spite of nausea Nan got hers down OK. The doctor's office called and said that since her blood was down to 7.1 she needed a transfusion and they were arranging it. We knew that meant a trip to Concord to the hospital for cross and type, a simple blood draw to find matching blood. So after Julie, the wound care nurse finished installing a new sponge in the incision we left for the hospital. Now they are on the phone telling us we have to come back to give more blood due to the anti body in her blood and the transfusion will not take place tomorrow.

Well two hours have passed and we worked out a new arrangement. Terri, our visiting nurse is coming to our house at 6 in the morning to draw blood and will take it to the hospital lab on her way to the city. She is doing this out of the kindness of her heart, what a lady. This will save Nan a trip of over 3 hours riding to just give blood in Concord. Everyone involved, blood bank lady, charge nurse at the hospital and Terri worked hard to figure out a better plan. This really works!

Nan is resting and watching new shows for the season, is now getting her IV of Levoquin, then we will start the TPN again, her vacuum pump is making its little grunting noises which Moo moo the kitty loves. I just made her a toast with peanut butter and some chocolate milk so she could take Gleevec and Rapamune. She had just finished throwing up and thought she would have a short window of time that she might be able to eat. We also slipped in another IV zophram to help her along.

Sylvia is coming out mid morning tomorrow to be with Nan. Sylvia and her husband Steve have been special friends for many many years and Nan enjoys them very much. She looks forward to seeing Sylvia tomorrow and the long hours pass a little quicker.

Sharon got home safely to good old Texas and is resting up. Her visit will always be remembered. She helped us both in many different ways and on many different levels, emotionally, physically, spiritually and socially. Plus she pumped shopping money into our local economy and helped Nan do a lot of things. Thank you Sharon, we love you so much.

I'm still trying to get as much work accomplished as I can, I could sure use some more hours in the day so I could meet Nan's needs better and still get this pesky appraisal stuff done. Loree is a great help and takes the phones most of the time so I can work in longer blocks of time. We are hopping right now with work and potential work, some of it is tough, a 40 acre property on a lake sells in a little town of Wilton and we get the order, not an easy appraisal to do. Tomorrow I see a property in Daly City and then in Sacramento before my day is over. Rush, rush about. many times I forget to eat altogether and remember hours later. I only have a tiny twinge in my side where the kidney stone pain was, not sure what is happening but so far no more big episodes of pain. Just hope I am not damaging a kidney in the process.

We both want to thank you for remembering Nan in your prayers. We also ask that you remember Dr. Glovers family members tonight. Today was the service and I'm told it was a very fitting service of remembrance of this special man. He will always be missed and I think especially of Yvonne tonight, she has lost her precious father who was not only her parent but a great friend to she and George as well. Yvonne and George, we are praying that God will comfort you tonight.

We were told that several of Nan's high school friends might come and visit this Sabbath afternoon, however at this point we are not sure when she will be receiving the blood transfusion. Probably on friday but someone should call first. Bob and Carol had also mentioned making a visit, same thing, lets talk first to make sure she is here. How we love to see people, Pam had mentioned coming tonight but when she heard that Nan had just gotten home and went directly to bed Pam kindly decided to visit a little later in the week.

Loree told me that funds had arrived for Nan's recovery fund. nan and I want to thank you for your help. We hope to be able to find ways to repay each of you or to assist in causes you believe in when we are back more fully on our feet. For right now every dollar is a miracle and we appreciate the help.

So we send our love and ask that in your prayers you remember Nan's continual vomiting, the high volume of drainage from her incision and the pain and pressure of the vac. pump on her tummy. We know it is working and we are thankful for that. Also the lower back pain has lessened to some degree for which we are very thankful. In the quiet of my office I can think of many things to be thankful for and many concerns that need God's answers. Such is life and we treasure it.


tim and nan
ps Dana went to MD Anderson today and got news which she thinks is good. She starts work tomorrow so we may not get to see her for awhile, bummer. Who is going to train these kitties?

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Tuesday evening-Nan is resting

Dear Friends and Family,

We are home resting now. Nan is actually asleep on the couch after resting during the day. She slips in and out of sleep, took some business calls for me, gave me advice about some appraisal work I was doing.

We all got up early this morning but Sharon really got up early, try 1:45 this morning. Could not sleep so she got up and did projects around the house until we got up at 5:45. I tried to complete an appraisal but ran out of time before having to leave for the airport. Nan came down since she did not want to be trapped upstairs all day while I was out working. With the wound vac and TPN machines attached she was really sort of tied down and could not do a lot of moving. So she is surrounded by pillows, the little table Sharon got her which holds her stuff, the phones and blankets, remote for the TV, tissues, water bottle, throw up bucket and trash can.

Sharon and I left about 7:20 for the airport and fought traffic all the way. We used back roads and made it in plenty of time. Then Sharon got to wait for an hour before her plane left. She was so sleepy and her eyes were sore. She will be so glad to settle into her own bed tonight and rest, she will sleep for many hours and deserves every one of them. Sharon helped us so much by her visit. She is energy plus, a great taxi driver, a great social director, a therapist, a cook, a cleaner, an organizer and a great friend. We will continue to enjoy her visit even though she has gone home. She was great for Nan and helped make the trip to Jason and Jo's house work out well. Thanks Sharon for everything!! And thanks Rick for sharing her with us. Hit her up for some time to go fishing, I think she might weaken and let you go.

Nan is looking forward to the end of the Lovequin, she thinks it is causing all the extra nausea and green bile. She is probably right. We have 4 more days of the Lovequin after tonight. So far no word from the Dr. office about blood infection based on the blood draws taken last week. So we wait for results. Nan's weight is gradually inching upward which we like. Now if she could just feel better and begin to enjoy life even a little bit. She has so much will power and is such a sterling example of one who tries her best. She is awesome in every way and all of us are proud of her, especially Keanna, how she loves her Grammie!!

Well its back to just the two of us now and so we'll adjust and do our best for each other. We are just trying to help Nan get on her feet and get stronger and healthier. Sylvia is planning to come on thursday and that will be nice for Nan since I will probably be gone for the day seeing properties. Thank you in advance Sylvia.

Please keep praying for Nan. She is worth it and your time. When we were in Boston we longed to be home, now we are home and we long for recovery to be completed. Yet we are together and working together to make things better.

We send our love and appreciation for the many many kindnesses and expressions of support and love you have shared with us.


Tim and Nan

Monday, September 25, 2006

Monday evening - Sharons visit draws to a close

Dear Friends and Family,

Nan is resting on the couch and is getting the IV of her Lovequin right now as she rests. Nikki and Keanna just left at 8:30 after a very pleasant visit. Nikki brought pizza and salad and we all ate our fill. Even Nan got into the spirit even though she has had a very touchy tummy all day. While she lost the first piece of vegetarian she kept the second down and along with Guava juice had a good meal. Sharon has given her a feet soaking and then pedicure so Nan's feet and toe nails look and feel great. Sharon is packing right now. She will have to go home to recoup after working night and day here. She and Nan have had many many happy moments in the past week. The first two days were spent in the doctors offices, then we went to Jason and Jo's for a few days and then back home for a couple days and she has to fly home. This trip has been a total blessing for Nan and me, although she faces her own set of challenges she has been a life giver to us both. Her faith, her courage and her sense of fun and love of life are inspiring. Words do not begin to cover how much we will miss her tomorrow. Yet we totally understand that she needs to get back to her work which is a mission of sorts for over 100 people every day.

Sharon flys out tomorrow at 10:35 and gets home at 6:20, when I drop her off I drive on to Santa Rosa and finish what I started last wednesday, then drive home and write the report and get it to the lender before the end of the day, we hope. It will be the first time Nan has been alone for a few days and she will probably just rest, rest, rest.

We see that Bob and Carrol got home safely from Tahoe and it sounds like they had a wonderful time even getting out on the lake on the Tahoe Queen which is a beautiful ride especially this time of year. We are glad they had a good time.

We were saddened to hear that Dr. Glover passed to his rest last night. He leaves very big shoes to fill. He was a very wonderful man and touched thousands of lives through his medical practice, through his generosity, his mission trips, his personal projects. Years ago when Nan and I were pastoring the Tracy church the Glovers gave us a trip to the holy land. A trip we will never forget. We will miss him greatly.

Nan has had a fairly tough day with lots of nausea yet she traveled to Tracy CostCo with Sharon and also the Social Sec. office. She came home at 3 pm and headed to bed for awhile. Later Mary came and visited with Sharon and then Nan called me and I brought her down. She has been down ever since. Her pain level is less today which is a nice change. The wound continues to drain a lot but her temp was normal this morning when the nurse was here. We have not heard back yet from the Dr.s regarding the blood cultures.

I'm going to round this up now. Many thanks for your continued prayers in Nan's behalf. We ask that you include Sharon's trip home tomorrow, that it be a safe one.

Good night or morning,

Sending love,

Tim and Nan and Sharon

One of God's own has fallen asleep

Dear Friends and Family,

Our dear friend Dr. Glover has fallen asleep in Jesus. I am including a photo taken at his 95th birthday party held at Dr. George and Yvonne Miller's home. We will miss this very special person. There has never been anyone like him ever and he has blessed thousands of lives over his years. Our hearts go out to his family members who loved and cared for him so carefully and to his loving wife Joyce who is the light of his life.


Tim and Nan

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Sunday evening, not like the beach

Dear Ones,

Sunday evening and Nan is lying on the couch in the family room resting. She and Sharon went shopping to town today and came home with some cute things. One is especially nice, a little folding table for space to hold her important things. They came back with meds from Longs and food from Taco Bell. Nan came back pretty tired and has been resting on the couch ever since. Well that is until she got up and directed cooking some food and then back to rest. She tried to eat a little bit but it did not work at all.

I've spent the day writing appraisals, driving comparables, keeping the wound vac working, loading the TPN, organizing my desk, looking over the financial desk with despair, bills are in piles according to dates, my life insurance lapses this evening and of course I won't be able to roll over the policy because I now have diabetes and of course kidney stones, all factors in getting new life insurance. So I will end up with a much smaller policy for more monthly fees.

Tomorrow I need to manage the following: socialize with Sharon since it is her last day, deal with the life insurance issues, continue to get appraisals out, somehow get some photos taken up in Santa Rosa, a 5 hour round trip, care for Nan as best I can, try to pass kidney stones and keep on going about my business. And hoping for checks in the mail, several came in Saturdays mail which helps cover payroll.

Well about now Nans antiobiotic will end and then we'll load up the TPN for the next 20 hours. Nan's fever is drifting upward again this evening after having a day of fairly normal temps. They bought a new thermometer in town but the instructions are written in elf size words and are tough to figure out.

My friend Art came by last night to give us a brief visit. It was great to see him. At this point I am having a tough time knowing Sharon is about to leave for home. Having her here is a dream and she and Nan love to do stuff together. Sharon is a rare person who cares and knows how to make good things happen all around her. We are thrilled that she could be here and it makes me personally sad, depressed that she has to go so soon.

It is good news that Roger is doing better in N. Carolina and at latest we have heard Dr. Glover is holding his own in Tracy.

Good night dear friends, please continue to pray that God will bless Nan with His healing of her various health issues.

with love,

tim and nan and sharon

ps thanks for coming by tonight Nikki and Keanna, great to see you again and to watch Keanna in action. I have included a photo of Sharon, Keanna and Nikki.

Saturday, September 23, 2006


Home safely

Dear Friends and Family

We are home safely and Nan had a very good time I think. She slept well last night and enjoyed time with Jason, Jo and Clayton. Jason has done such a good job with the yard and it is very calming to visit their home.

We had to manage a very difficult situation with the incision wound this morning. Just before we left we decided to make another change. We borrowed supplies from the neighbors and managed to get it to hold. Then we hit the road. Of course a piece of the motorhome broke but I was able to fix it. We had hoped to be able to stop and visit with Irene Wing but we could not due to the lack of time. As it was we got home at 3:30 in time for the wound vac nurse to replace the sponge and get the system working again.

It was fun to drive and listen as Sharon and Nan played cards and gossiped on the front bed. They had a blast and Nan has been feeling slightly better. Both Sharon and I think Nan is stronger than when we left on thursday. We have had wonderful weather, calm nights, pleasant times together, Nan and Sharon went shopping, we got to see Jason open his gifts, it was a great trip. Personally I was so ready for a break and some beach time walking with the dogs. God gave me a break. I have several important things hanging over me right now and could sure use more time than I have. My tax day is Oct 15 and I need to do a lot of prep for the accountant before then, our income is not matching the obligations and we need our accounts receivable to kick in big time. Nan's health concerns me a lot, the fact that the wound is putting out 300 cc a day of fluid indicates something is not right, the fact that the fever continues to hang around 101 and up is not good, the daily nausea is not good. Yet she seems stronger.

Well its bedtime and once again I continue to seek your powerful prayers in Nan's behalf. We have heard that our friend Dr. Glover is about the same, holding on and that Roger is doing better which gives us relief.

We love having Sharon here, she adds so much to our enjoyment and peace. She is a very good friend to Nan and they enjoy each other so much. We are so glad she was able to get away from her business to spend time with us. Our love is pretty tough and having her gentle touch makes things a lot better.

love to each and every one of you

tim, nan and sharon

Friday, September 22, 2006

Birthday at the end of the day or wound vac quits

Dear Friends and Friends,

Wow what a day! Nan has had a huge day. Nan woke the entire night only waking at about 5:30 this morning. Then she went back to sleep for awhile. Sharon was sleeping in Jason and Jo's home and she sort of slept in as well. We took Nan's temperature and for the first time in two weeks it was normal. Later she woke up and she and Sharon played cards for a couple hours, they munched on goodies and had a blast. Since Nan is both on a pain patch and takes Roxinol for breakout pain she tends to fall asleep rather quickly. Sharon would crack up watching her sleep. I headed for the beach with the dogs and enjoyed a very long walk and much needed exercise. While on the beach I was finally able to use the cell phone since it does not work where we are parked in the motorhome. It was chilly on the beach and by the time I got back all I could think of was a warm shower. It was great.

Nan and Sharon borrowed Jason's car and headed for the mall, Jason's birthday and all. Nan took her walker and they did the mall with her walking the distance. When she got back she was very tired and rested for awhile. They found perfect birthday gifts for Jason and Sharon wrapped them beautifully.

While they were gone I started to work and discovered that every time I started to write an appraisal the computer failed. Finally I restarted the computer and that solved it but by then I was too late to get it to the lender anyway. As the evening came on Jason and Jo came and he opened his gifts, a new memory foam pillow he had mentioned earlier in the day, a special water sprinkler device for his many plants, Nikki gave him a beautiful desk set with shells and a perfect card as usual. He loved everything he got.

The wound vac failed at about 5 pm. While Nan had a wound vac installed in Boston the little canister that collects the body fluids from the wound lasted a week or more. Well the canister was full this evening and we did not have a backup canister because we had no idea that over 300 cc of fluid would pass through the wound. We had to scramble and create a wet to dry dressing which will hold us until tomorrow when the next vacuum vac sponge will be installed. She is in good condition tonight. We gave her the second Leviquin dose tonight but just before we did her fever was over 101 again.

Nan walked into the house this evening on her own with Sharon and my help. She sat in Jason's recliner and had some good food that Jo had made. Jason and Jo had several students over tonight as a part of the school year, these are kids that are assigned to Jason as his special charges. He showed a very thought provoking movie. Mom and I did not make it through the entire movie, we got tired. We walked back to the motorhome where we prepared the TPN bag and got Nan ready for bed. She has been up and around several times this evening with pain but good energy as well. She and Sharon have had so much enjoyable time together today and being near the energy of Jason and Jo makes everything extra special.

Now we are getting ready to head to bed, that is when I uncover my bed, seems that is the place where everything has been stacked all day and now I need to reclaim it. We got an email from Carol and Roger is doing well but is so ready to get back to doing projects. He is having to be careful re: his diet, a very narrow of things he can have and that will take some time to get use to. We are so grateful to God for the good news about his recovery. I spoke to Yvonne this morning and found out that there is no change in Dr. Glover's condition, he remains in a coma. Joyce, Dr. Glover and the entire Miller family continue to need our prayers.

We are thankful for a good day. Please keep praying for Nan and for a safe trip home tomorrow. We send our love and deepest appreciation.

We send our love,

tim and nan
Thank you Jason and Jo for your wonderful hospitality! Its our first big venture out since the surgery and we are enjoying it very much.

Happy Birthday Jason

Dear Friends and Family,

Nan is resting in the front bed of our old motorhome which is parked next to Jason and Jo's home near the Pacific Ocean in La Selva Beach, CA. We had planned an early getaway yesterday but that was not to be. On Wednesday Sharon was kind enough to take Nan to the Dr to discovery the reasons behind the fever she has had. While she was there they attempted to draw blood from the PICC line but found a clot. So yesterday they went back to the Dr. again and they used medical roto rooter to clear the clot. They were able to do the clearing and then had to wait hours more before taking the blood for the culture. We won't know those answers until a couple days from now.

When Nan and Sharon got home in the mid afternoon from Concord Nan took a brief nap while I tried to complete some work that had been promised. When that was done about 5 pm then Sharon and I finished loading the motorhome. When I went to get the motorhome from storage its batteries were totally dead so back home to get a jump cable and then start the generator and then start the motorhome. It seemed we kept thinking of other things we might need and we had to make sure all medical things were on board. So we finally loaded Nan and the doggies about 6:45. Then a stop for Safeway for three things which ended up being a lot more. So at 7:30 we left Discovery Bay Safeway and started our trip. We had planned to stop at Irene's which is half way. But with the time getting away from us we called her and let her know we would just drive on through. We made a couple stops when Nan needed things, we started her Lovequin in the Safeway parking lot, it is IV push. I hung it on the oven knobs and it was done when we got here.

Jason turns 29 today and we are proud of his every year. Our children have been such an asset and pleasure over the years. We feel we have the greatest kids out there and have enjoyed the experience of their maturing and their accomplishments. They treat us so wonderfully and today we carry Nikki and Steve's present for Jason as they cannot be here. Jason was off to the gym this morning, a workout club somewhere nearby. We had a wonderful gift of flowers for the motorhome last night from Jo, just a perfect flower arrangement, full of color and cheer. Nan handled the trip down pretty well in spite of it being very bumpy in spots where the freeway is breaking down. She was on the memory foam laid over the front couch and slept most of the way here. When she wanted me she would just turn on her little flashlight. For the first of the trip we ran the generator and central AC but then it got cooler so we ran the inverter which has enough juice to power her vacuum pump for her incision. So far that is doing really great and on Sat. afternoon we need to be back home for the nurse to come and change the sponge to a new one. Through it all Nan remains Nan, good sense of humor, she and Sharon are fun to watch, neither of them have perfect hearing but they do just fine together.

Sharon's coming means a great deal to both of us. It has been discouraging as we wrestle with money or the lack of it, the constant pain with no obvious solution at this time, the fever and my own kidney stone which has refused to budge so far. The reason I have not blogged is simple, I ran out of time. On Wed I drove over 350 miles and visited Santa Rosa, Sonoma, Lincoln above Sacramento and Fairfield. It was actually too much and I ran out of light, sun refused to stand still over the mountains, and will have to go back to Santa Rosa which is another 5 hour round trip. I got home just before 10 that night and then needed to prepare the TPN bag and totally forgot to blog, just fell into bed. I carried my pain pills in case the stone started to move again but though I had a little pain no movement. On thursday I worked as hard and fast as I could to get appraisals emailed to lenders. Once I have seen a property it takes from 2 to 5 hours to write the report depending on what kind of report it is, relocation reports take all day and simple drivebys might take only an hour or so. I've had some challenging ones lately and I'm totally thankful for the work but I have a hard time being away from Nan for such long hours. With Sharon here caring for her and socializing with her being away has been less painful to me personally. We are very thankful for God's many blessings and we are so hopeful and prayful that He will heal the tumor pain she is experiencing with so much intensity. I keep thinking and praying, God you have done so much in the past year to help Nan through her GIST experiences, please don't stop now. It is a miracle that we can be here together this morning in the motorhome at Jason's considering the odds we were given directly after surgery, yes we face many obstacles but Nan is gaining slightly in weight, has at least some pain management going so she can enjoy life at least partially and can walk around, can eat small amounts at times, can communicate with her family and friends. I would love to see her get stronger and more on her feet and I believe we are headed that way. The wound vac can help complete the healing of the tummy incision, the lovequin can help with the blood infection if that is what it is and the TPN keeps her fed and balanced. The latest blood work showed a dramatic drop in Hemoglobin, down to 8.1 from 11 the week before and no one is sure why that happened. We will see. I think they are retesting the sample again to be sure.

Today we are going to relax and enjoy this beautiful place. Jason works for Monterey Bay Academy, a SDA owned boarding highschool located on the Pacific Ocean. There are about 240 students here this year and he is the marketing and recruiter for the school. In addition he does many other things with the students as well including making many trips to San Jose to the airport, doing week of prayers at feeder schools around the area, traveling to Alaska and even Hawaii to recruit students. He and Jo have a lovely home with a huge yard and Jason and Jo have recently done new landscaping which looks wonderful. Even a new walkway so Mom willhave it easier getting to the house. The weather is high fog right now and warmer later in the day. One can see the ocean from their home, rough break! We appreciate being able to park here and have electrical, cable and water hookups where we sit. Nice!! Even high speed internet off their wireless system in the house. And the price for parking is very right! Jason usually has odd jobs for me to do around the place which I love and I notice Jo's car is in the garage these days, a great idea since it is brand new and beautiful, a Mazda 3. Her first new car and we are so proud of them both.

Well enough for now, sorry about a two day lag in blogging. I am finding that my time is very stretched and I can't meet all the demands. Our taxes must be filed on Oct. 15 and I am days from being ready for the tax guy who also happens to be my next door neighbor. He is wonderful to me and helps all he can.

We send our love and truely wish you were here today with us. We are treasuring this outing and hope to get Nan home rested and OK in spite of the trip.

Please join me in praying for Dr. Glover and the family. Joyce, his wife, is so precious and a dear child of God, George and Yvonne have been true friends for many years and our heart is with them as they face this tough time. Please pray for Roger also as he recovers. Can we ask you one more time to pray that God will place His healing hand over Nan, give her relief from pain and suffering and strength in her recovery?

Sending our love,

tim and nan

ps. Loree, thanks for being such a huge help!

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Sharon arrived safely - Nan spikes a fever -

Dear Friends and Family,

It is so nice to finally be in a moment of calm. Nan has her new TPN bag going, dressing changed, lovenox shot given, baked potatoes eaten and fish watched.

Nan started her day feeling pretty rough, pain woke her a couple times last night. I headed down about 6:30 to work on an appraisal and to prepare for the day. nan came down a little later and we had our customary hot drinks together, later she headed back up and just before I left for a Hayward appointment I changed her dressing, made sure she had fresh water in her bottle and headed out. Hayward went fine and then to the Oakland airport to finally greet Sharon. She was on time but they took nearly an hour to get her bag delivered. Then we hit the road and found a Taco Bell where lunch was waiting. After that we drove to Clayton, a town which was on our way home and did a driveby appraisal and Sharon helped me find the properties and keep track of the photo order. Then we drove home on a narrow winding Marsh Creek Road. We arrived to find Nan resting but ready to see her beloved Sharon. Unfortunately Sharon was not able to sleep at all last night so is very tired tonight. It is so wonderful to have her in the house and we appreciate her selflessness in coming here to help and encourage Nan. Last night Nan was working on a list of things she hopes to accomplish with Sharon while she is here.

Some of the plans may have to wait a bit though. nan has run a fever all through the day, 101.2 to 101.4, which means something somewhere is not right. The oncology office has called and ask her to come in since her hemoglobin is already low again as well. However on a crucial number, white count it was in the normal range which should indicate that there is minimal infection going on. The fever could be caused by the slowly healing incision wound or by a urinary tract infection which she often gets with her unique plumbing. We moved up with the pain meds last night to 125, the highest she has ever had and she says she feels less pain but is sort of taking time to make sense of things today so we may be a little too high. Tomorrow she and Sharon will discuss some of these things with the doctor and try to reach some new conclusions. Tomorrow afternoon she gets the wound vac installed, the box came this morning. In spite of this meaning she will be hooked up to yet another tube she is very anxious to have the vac in so she can get this incision wound healed up completely.

Nan went to the kitchen tonight and directly Sharon to prepare some backed potatoes with sea salt and olive oil. They are so good, the whole house smelled good with them baking. She then came down to the table and had a few bites of potato and some green olives that she dearly loves. She has been pushing water today, lots of it which is a very good thing. She has vomited a few times but more than replaced what she lost with continual water drinking afterwards. You can tell Nan does not feel well, the fever makes her feel lousy, the nausea and pain drag her down as well. Yet she has a sense of humor and is very much in charge.

I am working very hard this week. Tomorrow I drive to Fairfield for an inspection, then Lincoln up by Sacramento, then Sonoma and then Santa Rosa. These towns are many miles apart and I'll probably be tired when I get home, very tired. So far the kidney stone makes itself known with tiny pains from time to time but nothing big, always there on my mind though, wondering when it will hit again. sharon has a magic cure, drink only fresh grapefruit juice for three days and then one cup of olive oil. People in Texas swear that this is the cure for kidney stones, what do you think?

We were saddened to read an email this morning letting us know that our dear friend and hero Dr. Glover suffered a head injury last night at home and is in the hospital in very serious condition. He is 96 years old and has lived an exciting life of accomplishments, charity and ministry to many people. He has helped Nan and me many times including a gift of a trip to the Holy Land when we lived in Tracy. I have been inspired by his stories, his manner of operating and by his big heart for the past 28 years. Nan and I are praying for God's will for Dr. Glover this evening.

We have heard that Roger is doing much better and is no longer in ICU. This is thrilling news and we were informed that Roger and Carrol are away to Tahoe for 5 days which is also thrilling considering how ill Carrol was a year ago.

While we have many concerns on our hearts we also have many things to be thankful for. The sunset over the lake tonight was beautiful, the cool breezes of the evening are refreshing and the steady string of orders for our company is also a blessing. Now if some of those delightful clients would just mail checks, that would be nice too.

So we send our thanks to all the people who help us each day and in so many ways, I thank Nan for being such a good patient and for having such a strong determination to get better. We missed seeing Keanna today but hope to see her again soon.

Please pray for guidance as nan and Sharon head to the doctor tomorrow. nan needs help with pain, nausea, fever and healing and God holds all the cards.


tim and nan

Monday, September 18, 2006

Boston clears things up

Dear Friends and Family,

We are getting ready to head up to bed just as soon as we put new pain patches on Nans body somewhere, hook up her TPN, do her dressing etc.

I wrote to Dr. Morgan this morning and tonight we had a response. He says " The CT looks remarkably good. There is a deep pelvic mass pressing on rectum, and this is a bit larger than it was on 7/20, but not strikingly larger. I really don't see any other major changes. One could consider radiation therapy, if not already administered to this site, to help control the pain."

How we appreciate his taking time to look at the CT scan. While we wish there was no change in tumor size this means there are not other new ones, this is the same one that was not taken out during surgery. We doubt we can do radiation since it is the same area as we had radiated last fall 27 times. So we will have to depend on modern medicine and God's grace to find a solution to the extreme pain Nan is having. At least we know why now.

Nan has had a rough day today, several bouts of nausea and spent the entire day after I left this morning upstairs. She was able to sleep quite a bit around times of intense pain. This evening Mary came over and brought two more pasta dishes under wraps and sat with us for awhile. She is so incredible supportive and sweet, she is very easy to love and appreciate. After Mary was here for awhile Nan came downstairs to sit in her chair, to eat a toast with peanut butter so she could take her Gleevec and Rapamune. She has also drank two glasses of water and is now catching up on her emails.

She is finding out that Roger is out of ICU which is great news. We are relieved for both he and Carol. Its hard having loved ones so far away when you would like to visit. When we get his mailing address we'll pass it along so we can flood him with cards.

Bob and Carrol are going to Tahoe for a short vacation with her sister, that is great news and their cancer numbers were good this time as well.

I worked hard today and I'm thankful that my pain was minimal, that I was able to see everything that was scheduled and that I made it home by 7 tonight. We are both so thankful that Sharon is coming tomorrow. I work hard tomorrow and Wednesday and then we take the motorhome out of mothballs and drive to Jason and Jo's on thursday and come back sometime this weekend. Nan is sort of dreading and looking forward both to the trip. Sharon comes in around noon tomorrow to Oakland so I scheduled an appraisal for the trip in. After I get her home and settled I will go out again to work, got to keep those nickels rolling this way.

My kidney stone is stalled right now, I know it is there with twinges of pain but nothing serious yet. I hope and pray that nan can have a better day tomorrow. She has been running a fever today, 101.2 this evening. We think the wound Vac might help and it is being put in on wednesday morning, then nan goes to the oncologist due to the fever. I hope Sharon can take her in.

Well I'm heading to become a nurse for the next 1/2 hour and then sleep. Sort of feel like we both deserve to sleep well tonight.

Please pray intensely regarding Nan's pain. Something special is going to have to happen for this pain to subside. God can do it if it is in His plan.


tim and nan
ps please pray for a safe trip for our beloved Sharon.

Sunday, September 17, 2006

Sunday, not too bad

Dear Friends and Family,

Nan is reading last nights blog, its the first time she has read a blog by herself and I'm delighted she is interested. She has had a pretty good day. This morning we got up late and I went to work, a little later she called and came down and we had hot drinks together. I went back to work and eventually she announced she was ready to go back up for a nap. Instead we took a walk in the wonderful breezes. In spite of every step hurting she enjoyed the walk and did a great job of it. Then having certainly earned the right to a nap she went up to rest. I worked and got an important relo appraisal out. During the day my kidneys began to let me know that the stone was not yet passed so I took one pain pill and kept working. Nikki called in the late afternoon and in the conversation she reminded me Longs Drug closes early on sunday. I needed to get Nan's pain patches so I hit the road, made it with 2 minutes to spare. Nikki talked to Nan and invited us to dinner at their house. Steve was doing his magic with the BBQ. So we loaded up, nan walked to the car, rode up front and then walked into the house on her own steam, Keanna was delighted that grammie was visiting. Nikki and STeve had a great meal prepared and mom enjoyed some watermelon, sat in the recliner on a heating pad and enjoyed watching Keanna do her thing. She showed us how fast she can run now, that she can dance on one foot and lots of other things, she ate a big dinner even trying new things.

After dinner we headed home but hated to miss any of the new season of amazing race, a great show we all like around here. Now I am blogging, nan has just finished reading yesterdays blog and I have her TPN ready to go, all we have to do is her dressing and then sleepy time.

We were very saddened today by the passing of one of the very impressive GISTers we have tracked over the months on the web site. It is always so hard to accept that this terrible disease has taken another precious life, oh that a cure could be found that would stop the tumors in their tracks, we long and pray for it all the time.

Tomorrow I have a very long day out in the field seeing properties. I hope my kidney stone won't decide to be on the move again but I am ready with my pain meds. Been drinking tons of water and cranberry juice and so far I have been able to keep functioning. Just hope I am not damaging my kidneys in the process.

nan will be alone most of the day, nurse is coming at 9 and LeAnn, our next door neighbor will be home until about 1 pm and nan can call on Loree who lives nearby. I'll be home by 6:30 or 7 and will be tired by then, in fact I'm tired now and I have not started the day yet.

We send our love and deepest appreciation for all the things, words, prayers that come our way. Nan deeply appreciates knowing that people care enough to pray for her. She was touched today that Karen Cress found a moment in her schedule to call and chat. Words and the people behind them do matter and make life a lot better. You have a lot of power in what you do.

We have been praying and thinking about our friend Roger all day today. We trust that he is better and anxious to leave his ICU bed and get home, soon Roger, soon, relax and rebuild my friend.

Please continue to pray for Roger, for Nate and for Nan that the source of her pain can be pinpointed and then dealt with. Its in His hands and we trust Him.


tim and nan

Saturday, September 16, 2006

Sabbath evening - rest and friends

Dear Friends and Family,

Nan is resting now and its about 11 in the evening. Today we both woke up a couple times in the morning before getting up. We decided I needed to attend Tracy SDA church this morning. Nan could not due to pain and nausea. My intention was to attend to worship, ask for special prayer for Roger and Carol and to let people know who we were doing. Nan intended to stay in bed for awhile and then head down to use her recliner. Just before I left I changed her dressing and gave her Zophram. She feel asleep and was still in bed when I got home after service. It was a very warm experience and I got to see many of our closest friends. I was touched with their concern and expressions of help, a very kind person put something in my pocket and when I opened it on the way home I found 4 safeway cards to purchase groceries and 2 gas cards. I was shocked and very humbled with this kindness. Emily slipped something into my pocket, "spending money" was all she said. Nan and I thank everyone for their warmth, prayers and special helping. It was so good to see everyone including pastor Jim and I finally found out that Jamie's wedding went off great. We hated to miss the wedding and have wondered how it all turned out. People told us it was great. What a sweet girl, lucky guy.

When I got home Nan got up and we prepared to welcome Bob and Carol who were on their way over to visit. We had a great time with them, asking questions, discussing our vans, they are nearly identical, talking about pain and answers. Carol is doing so well considering all the challenges she faces and Bob is like the ultimate care giver. They are so inspiring and great friends to us in every way. They brought some of the most beautiful tomatoes today, huge, yummy and mouth watering plus a little watermelon for tomorrow.

After Bob and Carol headed home I made raviollis for dinner. Nan had some and we both enjoyed them. We both had hot drinks and finally Nan gave up and came back up to bed. I spend the early evening going through boxes of letters and magazines that had been there since Boston. I found a few bills, lucky me. Then I paid bills for awhile until I lost heart. Sure did better than I planned thanks for the kindness of our friend and the checks in the mail today.

We have heard that Roger is doing well now after having a lengthy procedere inserting a stent in a mostly closed artery. Carol and famly are with him and get to see him every two hours for 10 minutes. Please keep Roger and Carol in your prayers, they are precious children of God and this is a total shock to them. We will pass on more reports when we get them.

This has been an OK day and once again we are reminded of God's blessings. This morning Syliva Ahn, our long time friend from Tracy, told of a blessing she had received. She was pulling slowly through an intersection with a green light and suddently someone blasted through the red and would have hit her if she had started up briskly instead of being extra cautious. It was a real blessing that God watched over her. If we only knew that what God does for us, if we only knew.

Please pray that Nan is get back on the road to recovery. She and I send our love and appreciation to the many people who have touched our lives today. Thank you.

tim and nan

Friday, September 15, 2006

Friday evening 11:48 pm

Dear Friends and Family, Fellow GISTers and Care Givers,

Nan is settled in for the night. Her day included a trip to Concord to see our oncologist which was mildly helpful. He was kind enough to up her pain patch to 100 after the lower doses have not touched the lower back pain. He too found the radiologist report from last Saturday's CT scan confusing. The report seems to refer to more than one mass being in play now but is not very helpful because the only reference point the poor radiologist had was a CT scan taken in April of this year which is well before the large surgery in Boston. The oncologist did report that the blood work shows Nan's body to be in pretty good balance now and she is gaining weight slowly. Her PH is good, her potassium and magnessium were both good, her hemoglobin was 11 which sure beats the 8 she had last friday before the blood transfusion. We also found out that the reason Nan felt so good and alive at the end of the transfusion was the mild steriod they gave her. He alluded to the fact that a little steriod given once in awhile can be of assistance but he warned that steriods get in the way of healing. We were late to our appointment due to an equipment failure, happens sometimes without warning and we always travel with back up supplies, still no fun for Nan to have to cope with and cope she does so well. What an amazing lady.

When we got home from the Dr. we had decided that I should use the afternoon to get some work done so I drove to Palo Alto, 1 and 1/2 hours to do a driveby appraisal, that means I just stop in front of the subject property and shoot a photo of the front, note the features and condition from the street, take a street photo and then go shoot comparable sales that are as similar to the subject property as possible. Then I hit the road.

In my last blog I think I may have seemed a bit to human, sort of down, feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders, sorry about that. Out of the blue a person called today to offer some immediate assistance with the mortgage payment, my first reaction was to say no but Nan stopped me when she said, you've been praying for answers and perhaps God is responding, well that put a different outlook on things and so with humility we both express our appreciation for the help we received today. Let me tell you, things look more positive tonight than they did last night. Thank you secret friend for your kind assistance today.

When I finally completed my battle with weekend traffic and got home around 8 I found Nan awake and in pretty good spirits. Our visiting nurse had come by to double check that Nan was receiving the entire 1500 ml of TPN with the new computer setting. I was thinking she was not getting the entire amount since some was left in the bottom of the bag each evening. Turns out I was wrong. After I got home Nan came down and I made her a peach smoothie with peaches Barb and Gerry had brought and left here. Since I had to drink the extra I know personally that it ended up tasting great. Nan had a big glass of 2 peaches, ice cream, ice, soymilk, honey and strawberries. Then later in the evening she had a hot drink of mocha she had me buy last night at Costco. Then a glass of water. She and Starr sat in the recliner on the heating pad and although Nan was hurting a lot she hung out until nearly 11 pm. Then we made our way upstairs. Now she is sleeping and gradually her pain will subside since she just took Roxinol on top of the pain patch.

We are both so very glad that this week is drawing to a close. Two big doctor appointments and trips, stress over new tumor growth or not, wondering if we get a wound vac or not, now we know it is coming next week, wrestling with financial issues, IRS, lenders and so it goes. Finally tomorrow we will be together without stress, take it easy and probably enjoy the good weather on the back deck some, takes some naps, walk the dogs and worship God through listening to great CDs, hopefully get to see someone who gets lost and drives this way!! Perhaps even get to see Keanna.

Tonight as I reflect on the week I remember the worst personal pain I have ever felt, kidney stones, Boston contained the worst emotional pain I have felt, the strange world of vicodin and its effects, waking to hear Nan's soft groaning with pain, driving for hours trying to miss the bumps so Nan's bed would not bounce around. I also remember the courageous stand Nan took at 4 am when we went to the ER and she drove, she drove mind you with intense pain but she would not have it any other way, she simply said, we are a team, now get in the car!

Good and bad, we all experience it, we groan from the weight of it and we grow from the pressure of it. How much our Heavenly Father must love us.

Thank you so much to so many this week, it was great to hear from my sister Sibyl, my brother Jerry, Sharon, Dana, Joe and Linda, Mary, our wonderful times with Irene, our great start to the week with Barb and Gerry, really we have much to be thankful for. And we have gotten to
see Keanna nearly every day and Steve and Nikki. Thank you all for your kind messages to the blog.

We send our love and thanks for your prayers in Nans behalf. She certainly needs them now.

Tim and Nan

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Nan is an amazing lady!

Dear Friends and Family,

During the night I developed severe pain in my right side and eventually right back side. After hours of trying everything I could Nan decided that enough was enough and we were going to ER. I had planned to just sneak out and drive myself to Antioch but she was having none of it. So this sweet lady who had had such a tough day got up, dressed, carried her TPN and purse downstairs and drove me to the hospital. First time behind the wheel for about 4 months. She did great and while I was curled up in a tiny ball trying to find a more comfortable spot she drove. By the time we pulled up at ER my pain was getting less. I went in and she climbed in the rear of the Odyssey and went to bed and slept the entire time I was in ER, about 3 and 1/2 hours. After two hours I finally saw the doctor and she wanted me to stay for CT scan and blood work but since I was no longer hurting I checked myself out and we came home. By the time we got home I was hurting again and it got worse and worse. Good old kidney stone! Loree came and took the prescription from ER to the local Longs Drug and came back with Vicodin. Even though by then the pain had gone again I took two and stayed low for several hours. It was so sad because Loree had laid out a perfect day of work that would have generated about $2,000 of income. We had to cancel it all and try to reschedule for early next week. In the afternoon I got tired of sleeping and went to Tracy to shoot some photos for an appraisal that I had started, hit Sonic for tator tots, hit CostCo for more mocha hot drink, (sharon is coming and we have to be ready for her) and came home.

Nan was in pain all day and stayed in bed trying to get some sleep. She finally did get some this afternoon and early evening. Tomorrow we see the oncologist and will get his read of what is causing the pain. Nausea has been much better for Nan today but she has eaten almost nothing, one piece of toast so she could take her Gleevec and Rapamune. The wound vac is coming next week and insurance has allowed one month. Our part to pay is 30% of about $1,700 for the month of rental of the vac.

Sometimes it seems the load is pretty heavy around here for Nan and me. We are totally on a survival mentality now, pain pretty well controls everything so there are no meals to fix, no smoothies to make, no morning times when we sit together and sip mocha's. We just deal with pain. Today was so disappointing for me personally because I felt my body let me down and I was not able to do my part, I let the chance for needed income slip right through my fingers, bummer.

After we see the doctor tomorrow in Concord which is about 45 minutes to one hour distant we will come home and then I drive about an hour to Oakdale to see three properties owned by the same person. Even at the discounted rate that lender pays it will still be a nice way to finish up the work week. This week we spent Wed. at UCSF, today being plagued by the kidney stone and tomorrow at the doctor. Challenging to get work completed and emailed to the lender.

When they weighed Nan in SF she was 111 which is up considerably over what we knew about. Hopefully that is a good sign for future health. Due to my being ill today we did not get the CD shipped back to Boston yet and we need to do that soon to get their professional opinion, we trust them most.

Keanna and STeve came to visit today and really that was the high point of the day. When Keanna got ready to leave she wanted to kiss my hurting place so she kissed my tummy, what a sweet tender loving child we are blessed with.

Well its change dressing and prepare the TPN bag time now. Neither are a big deal since we've done them so much that both are sort of automatic for us.

Well I think I probably should count my blessings, no pain right now, no vomiting right now, cool day to enjoy, lots of work to do, wonderful helpers Loree and Steve help hold things together and a wonderful brave wife who gets out of a painful bed to drive me to the hospital in the middle of the night. Thhat is courage for sure.

I think it is obvious that we need your prayers tonight, Nan needs divine healing for the extreme pain she is coping with, I could use some divine help with this kidney stone and we sure need God's help financially. Tomorrow is payroll and house payments, at this point I can cover payroll but house payments are another matter and we have never been late for a mortgage payment, its the worst thing one can do to your credit history. So we will watch God's blessing tomorrow and over the weekend and know He is in charge. Tonight I am so tired and a bit discouraged but not out, just down a bit. Needless to say we are sure looking forward to see Sharon on Tuesday. She is always such a boost to our morale.

We send our love,

tim and nan

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

A very long day!

Dear Friends and Family,

Its 9:40 now. We left at 8:30 this morning for a 10:30 appointment in San Francisco at the UCSF with Dr. Warren. Unfortunately he was running late and we ended up seeing him finally around 2:20. Nan was in severe pain the entire time but was a champ about it all, no complaining, just toughed it through. Our day was lightened by Irene Wing driving up from San Jose to spend the waiting room time with us. None of us had any idea it would be so long so we ended up having hours to talk. Her visit really helped the time pass for both of us. She is like an angel send from God and we thank her for her help today!

Our visit with Dr. Warren was cordial, he is really a very nice man. In his opinion from viewing the CT scans Nan does not have new tumors but he is not a radiologist. We are shipping a CD of the CT scan to Boston tomorrow, to Dr. Morgan and Dr. Bertagnolli to get their expert opinion as well. Dr. Warren gave us the go ahead to have the wound vac installed as soon as possible, he did not express a guess as to what is causing the pain in Nan's lower back or the nausea. He did offer to provide surgical assistance at any point where we need it and we feel good about having a west coast surgeon who is familiar with GIST and its unique characteristics. When we left Irene accompanied us to the van where we have a bed set up. Nan slept most of the way home and earlier today slept from home to the Bay Bridge which is the majority of the trip each way.

Nan spent some of her time on the phone with people who called in as we drove. Nikki reminded us that she planned to come by and make dinner at 6:30. When she and Keanna arrived we sort of kept it quiet and Nan slept until about 8:15 when Keanna went up and showed her school photos and professional photos taken recently. Nan loved them, sooooo cute. Nikki modeled some new clothes she had purchased for Nan and then they went home to get Keanna to bed. Their coming was so special. I asked God for blessings today and He sent Irene, Nikki and Keanna, about as good of blessing as one can ever hope for. Dinner was great, Nikki found white corn this late in the season and it was awesome. Also made cottage cheese loaf which is a family favorite.

Tomorrow I have to pretend to be an appraiser, first to Palo Alto, then Vallejo, then Walnut Creek, Then Danville, then Alamo and finally home. It will be a long day and I hope Nan will be OK with me away. She says yes and she does have people she can call on if she needs help. Still I hate to leave her for such a long time.

Thank you for your prayers for Nan. Today we got an opinion that there are not new tumors growing, we certainly hope that is the case. Today we did not find out the cause of the pain or nausea and that was disappointing to say the least. We see our oncologist friday and hopefully we can explore a better pain management level and other options.

Thanks for your love and prayers of support. This has been a tough day, pain, waiting, anxiety, stress, yet we made it through. Praise God for that.


tim and nan

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Its a tough time right now....

Dear Friends and Family,

This evening my emotions are scrambled. Of course they relate to how Nan is doing and what is happening to her. She has had a very low key day with mostly bed rest, several episodes of vomiting, liquid diet only today, mostly water. In spite of the water making her vomit she continues to drink knowing that she needs to avoid getting dehydrated. Nan was up about every two hours last night wrestling with pain and or nausea. She has been running a low grade fever of about 100 for a couple days and has not felt good since late sunday afternoon when things starting to fall apart for her. She is braving her way through the current situation like she always does but is very tired, hopefully todays rest helped her.

We have a big day tomorrow which was supposed to be a meet and greet meeting with Dr. Warren, Dr. Bertagnolli's friend and fellow surgeon who practices at UCSF. However our meeting will be more important since we have a CT scan CD to take to him from Saturday in Concord and the radiologist report that was faxed to us this afternoon. What is weighing on our mind like a mack truck is whether there are new tumors growing. I read the report that was in our fax but I can't really understand what it is saying and the radiologist was handicaped in that all he had to refer back to was a CT taken in April of this year before the June 6 surgery in Boston. Dr. Warren should have a copy of the CT scan that was done about 1 and 1/2 months to 2 months ago in Boston near the time we left the hospital. At that time there was no new activity but with the extreme pain nan is now having in her lower back our thoughts go to last year at this time when a tumor was causing so much grief that we had to do radiation on it. So we have Nan feeling terrible, running a low fever, possible new tumor growth, and now a long trip to the city to the Dr. Our dear friend Irene is going to meet us there and help us find our way around and we really appreciate that very much.

I've been trying to work around the medical stuff and take good care of Nan as well as produce appraisals. I try to go see properties when she is sleeping as she was this afternoon. I'm so glad that people call, mary, sharon and possibly others that I don't know about, keep it up please, it lifts nan's spirits so much to talk to her family and friends.

This morning when Gerry and went to Stockton to see a house Keanna and Steve came over to visit. Keanna made her way up the stairs and opened grammies door and in a little voice asked her if she was awake, when Nan said yes Keanna started talking to her and asked her if she could come down stairs for awhile, Nan said yes and they had a great time together. They were still here when we got back so Gerry and I got to see she and Steve as well.

Nan and I both can't find enough positive words to describe our thanks for Barb and Gerrys visit. It was a last minute love trip for them and they helped us in so many ways, food, games, cleaning, planning, getting rid of trash, cleaning and more food. They are such a help in so many ways, we always just cry when we see them load up and go home and yup it happened to me again today. Barb is so good with nan and has been a friend for so long that they just click well together. Gerry is a very positive help to me too, we talk about important things and that helps a lot. Gerry rearranged the garage so now two cars can be parked inside and lots of non essential stuff is gone. Steve and Nikki helped a lot too by taking things that can be sold or given to other parents of little children.

My faith is more than quart low tonight. Nan and I both know knowledge is the best thing because then you start to dig and plan to meet the new challenges but I long for Nan to feel better, to get to start enjoying life after the the long journey she has been on for the past year. I am asking from the bottom of my heart that you remember Nan in your prayers tonight and tomorrow. We seek God's will and trust that He will do the right things in Nan. We long for peace and lack of pain and suffering, to be able to enjoy a good meal without regrets later, to be able to take short trips to places we love and to visit people we miss so much.

How we look forward to Sharon's visit which begins next tuesday. God has surrounded us with solid, faithful, loving people and we treasure every one of them.

Compounding our situation is many of the deferred things we put off while in Boston are coming due now. We are stretching every penny as far as we can and so far we are getting most things paid not too far behind their due dates. However in 3 days our house payments are due again, God has been blessing with lots of work and some checks nearly every day but so far they have not caught up with the needs caused by a couple months away. I do not know how to balance Nan's needs against something as mundane as appraisals yet producing appraisals keeps the roof over our heads, food, fuel and car payments made. I find it a very difficult challenge to leave here and go see properties and leave Nan alone. She is not complaining at all and we do have people she can call if she needs help but after Boston where I was there for 54 days meeting only her needs this seems so foreign and wrong somehow. Am I being blunt enough? I just don't have all the answers right now.

However at this moment Nan needs a new TPN bag prepared for her nutrition and hydration so I will bring this to a close. I know we will know more tomorrow night about a lot of things. Dr. Warren is going to make a decision regarding the wound vac tomorrow and we think he will say yes. That will help the closing wound get finished and we are told Nan will feel better when that happens. We will have a better idea about tumor growth and what to do about it if there is new growth. We will have a surgical friend on the west coast with an excellent reputation to turn to.

Please pray, thank you for praying.


tim and nan

Monday, September 11, 2006

A very dark monday, Nan in intense pain

Dear Ones,

This will be short as I still have to prepare Nan's TPN bag and change her dressings. She went up about 1/2 hour ago and I'll wake her when I come up to do the medical things.

Nan's terrible day started during the night when her lower back became so painful that she could not stay in bed, she tried about everything to ease the pain and finally at 5 we came down so she could lie on the heating pad in a different position. She had already had bouts of vomiting and extreme nausea by then. She was able to get a little sleep and so I slept in a recliner nearby. At about 7 we woke up and I made her a hot drink, then a toast so she could try to get her meds down. The pain got worse and worse and when the nurse came she took in the situation and called Nan's oncologist team to get Roxinal, a morphine med. Sandy, our pharmacist at Longs did not have the drug on hand but arranged for it from her competitor at Safeway. Terry, the nurse went by the Concord office and picked up the hard copy of the prescription to deliver to Safeway later in the day. Gerry and I drove in and picked up the med and came home so Nan could get some possible relief. She started to take tiny doses of it under her tongue and eventually got some relief. However morphine causes her to vomit and so she had several more times of vomiting. All day she has run some fever ranging from 101.7 to slightly below 100. She has felt terrible but continued to try to drink liquids. It is one of the worst days Nan has ever had, such a contrast to yesterday when she did so much and felt so good. As you might imagine I have been a nervous and very stressed out wreck. Nikki called and that helped a lot, just to get to talk to her, Art also called and it was good to talk for a minute to him. mary has been helping nan all day with encouragement and offering to help in any way she could. Barb and Gerry have been wonderful help. Gerry took it as a challenge to get my bug into the garage and after last night's failure to get it in he went to work moving things about. Well its in the garage tonight, pretty tight indeed but its in and he feels good about his accomplishment.

In business we are suddenly busy again but I'm out on Wed. taking Nan to UCSF to see Dr. Warren and on friday to see the oncologist in Concord. Busy times and I'm behind. I sure do miss Nate. Fortunately Jean will see settled soon and can start writing to assist me with the load.

Loree has been very busy today coping with lots of business calls and things to do.

Everything is hopping, now if we could just have some good news for Nan, if she could just feel better again.

I've been praying last night and all day today for God to intervene and help her with the pain, the suffering, the being sick. How we need to see Him in action for Nan.

Please pray for sweet Nan, she's had it tough today. We are praying and hoping for a better day tomorrow.


tim and nan and barb and gerry

Sunday, September 10, 2006

Sunday evening - Nan had an amazing day

Dear Friends and Family,

Nan was full of surprises today once again. As I mentioned yesterday that about noon on Sabbath after the first unit of blood was starting to hit Nan seemed to start feeling much better. A number of factors came together which may have had an effect. We rose and went to the hospital in a very weak condition, Nan was in intense pain and on the edge of nausea for the entire trip in. The nurses are so kind and assessed the situation. They gave her another dose of zophram for nausea and in anticipation of the blood transfusion gave her benedryl (sp) and a steriod, then they started the blood. That morning Nan had also decided to add a 25 patch for pain to her 50 which she had just started on friday evening. So she went from 25 to 75 in one day. I talked to God a lot during the hours we were at the hospital seeking His direct healing help, telling Him how nice it would be if we could sit on a picnic bench or a walk through a park and just talk. Seeking His will be done in Nan.

By 1 pm she was much more animated and vocal, sleeping less and talking on the phone to family. Finally they came to take her to the CT scan which went well. We anxiously await the results of that scan fearing new tumor growth. Also compounding our concerns was the fact that the new drug supplier of Gleevec that our insurance company has forced us to use did not keep their word and although they promised to ship Nan's Gleevec on Tuesday it has yet to arrive. This afternoon nan remembered that she had a small supply in her backup med case in her purse so she is set for a few days, thank you Lord for this small blessing.

By mid afternoon Nan was much more alert and ready to rumble, she woke me by mentioning lets go have a banana split on the way home. Considering Nan had eaten almost nothing for the prior 3 days I was shocked and delighted. We planned to drive to Tracy to Sonic but then Nan decided we could make them at home with Barb and Gerry's help. When we got home Barb and Gerry were at the house and we set to work to get Nan settled and banana splits constructed. They were great and Nan ate all of hers, amazing! Then we played train Dominos until 12:30, Nan was still wide awake but I urged her to head to sleepy land. Well we went to bed but she was wired, was not able to sleep for a couple hours and then only fitfully. Finally early this morning she did get some better sleep. For some reason her incision wound is putting out lots of liquid and soaking the dressings rapidly, we long for the wound vac to be put into place which would solve all of that. Soon we hope.

Nan is now on 20 hour TPN so has a few hours each day without being tethered to the bag. She and Barb worked all day sorting clothes and opening boxes in the living room, in fact Nan worked too hard. She also helped with making dinner this evening. We had tostadas with fresh tomatoes, sweet lettuce, good beans, yummy cheese and avocado. So good. Barb and Nikki prepared the food. Earlier this afternoon Barb and Nan drove to Longs for supplies and then Safeway. Nan drove the little cart around and did a lot of walking, well this evening after eating a full meal which included lettuce she did not feel so strong and was resting. She went up around 8:30 with a bit of a sore throat and sort of beat. Yet she was in such good spirits, was upset with herself that she had not accomplished more, 2 days ago she was not able to be out of the chair or bed and was very very tired, the blood helped, the increased pain control helped and her attitude is just wonderful. She told me this morning that she wished she could go to apple hill today, a place we enjoy going each fall where there are lots of farms and orchards and yummy things to eat. Our friends Bob and Carrol are going up this week but I can't break free this week from work since we will be in SF with the surgeon Dr. Warren on Wednesday and back to the oncologist on friday. Plus Gerry had be working so hard today in the garage that I've not gotten my appraisal work completed like I usually do on sundays.

Short story, Nan is much better, feeling better and with more energy and spirit for which we are thankful, she went from 10 am yesterday until 5 pm this afternoon without any new zophram, without back pain. Amazing.

Barb and Gerry have once again worked like mad troopers all day and are so sore they can hardly move. Seems like their visits always bring such hope and help.

It was fun to watch Keanna and Nikki do homework for Keanna's school day tomorrow. She is starting to draw nice stick figures and Nikki found some very neat photos to include. I took a picture of it. Her first homework! at 3 years old.

Steve came over today and helped a bunch with the garage, left his enclosed trailer to pile full of trash. Nikki and STeve found several things that they can sell on EBay or in an upcoming massive yard sale Nikki helps with in Livermore. Nice to see the things get used. We also have a bunch of giveaway items on the street for a charity that is coming in the morning.

We send our love and would appreciate your continued prayers. While it is true that nan is better now we know that life and recovery has ups and downs. We are loving this up and this woman is so easy to love and admire, such courage, such beauty, such a cutie!!

with love

tim and nan

Saturday, September 09, 2006

Good evening from John Muir Hospital

Dear Friends, Family and fellow GISTers,

We have spent the day at lovely Joh Muir Hospital in Concord. Overall it has been a good day so far. We arrived here at around 9 and Nan got her first unit of blood around 11:30. Then the plan was for the CT scan at 1 pm which turned into a 3 pm CT scan. Then back to the room for the second unit of blood. We started the day with a scare, Nan's temp was 102.7. However that was driven by her sitting in the window in the sunshine and sitting on the heated car seat all the way in. The temp has dropped during the day and is now normal again, yea!! About mid day Nan started to feel much better, talks about food she might like and is alert and feeling better again. They gave her a Zophram and 1/2 mg of dilautide for pain. She had a popsickle, lots of water and is ready to leave now. Soon we will hit the road. The minute they say we can leave we are out of here. Barb and Gerry just arrived at our house a few minute ago. We were sure we would be there by 6 but once again the hospital has taken longer to do its thing than we ever expect.

We are both nervous about the report from the CT scan. We have two copies of the CD one for the Dana Farber Cancer Institute and one for Dr. Warner at UCSF. We see him on wednesday in San Francisco and by then we will know the results of the CT. Fellow GISTers will recognize the stress and anxiety that comes from waiting to hear results from CT scans. Both for the patient and for the care giver.

We are looking forward to playing dominos with Barb and Gerry tonight. After we leave here we have an hour drive home. Nan is looking so much brighter than at any time in the past week, it is wonderful. She looks so lovely with her head on her special high density foam pillow, her blond hair swept back, her face in a grimace because she has seen something on the food channel that does not look good. So its time to dress her, get her in the wheel chair and head home.

It will be so nice to have Barb and Gerry with us, not just for the help but for the fellowship.

Please pray with us that God will continue to guide in all things for Nan. We pray for healing, for recovery, for tumor resistance.


tim and nan

Friday, September 08, 2006

Friday evening Home at last

Dear Freinds and Family,

Finally it is friday evening. We rolled out this morning finally around 7 after being awake at 5 and 6. Nan woke with pain and choking on nasal drainage. We came down about 7:30 and got ready, left for the Dr. and Concord at 8:17. Traffic was light and we made it in an hour. Dr. was helpful and listened to Nan's concerns. Nan's pain patch was moved from 25 to 50. We found out that the 25 level is the lowest one can have and it has not begun to solve the pain Nan has been experiencing. We hope this helps. After we left the Dr office we went directly to the hospital to type and cross for the blood transfusion. We are supposed to go in at 9 in the morning for the transfusion and for a CT scan. Past experience has taught us that we will be there all day in the process. At least Nan will get a boost of energy. Her hemoglobin was 8:1 today and she is usually very tired at anything below 9. So it is time to get some blood going. Hopefully that will help her feel much better in a day or two. She has not had a bite to eat all day today, so close to nausea and extreme fatigue, no interest in eating. We did have our normal hot drink this morning but that was it food wise. Right now I am going to prepare a small glass of chocolate milk so she can take her evening Gleevec. Nan tolerated the ride to the Dr. and back better than I had anticipated. Her seat has a warmer in the car and she was able to find a fairly comfortable place there in the car.

After putting her to bed this afternoon I managed to catch up with an appointment that was sort of hanging for a sale over in Stockton. I drove over quickly and inspected the home, shot the comps and then came back home. Then to Brentwood for the prescriptions which included the pain patches, Safeway for some needed food items and home again. Nikki and Keanna came over and made dinner. Dinner was very good and we all enjoyed interacting. Keanna insisted on butterfly and eskimo kisses when they left. Fun, fun having her and Nikki here. Helps Nan feel better too.

Tonight we've changed the dressing, readied the new TPN bag and now have it hooked up feeding Nan her nutrition. Something must be working because she weighted 107 at the doctors today, yea! Thats 10 lbs up from her low point in the hospital a month ago. But this has been a very rough week for Nan. We hope the reason was the hemoglobin being low. It has certainly effected her like this in the past but that does not explain the nausea and powerful back pain. I have been praying off and on all day seeking God's help with her current health issues. How I long for her to prosper and begin to enjoy her life again. We have had some windows of hope but also lots of down time when she does not feel well.

Please pray that the transfusions will go well tomorrow, that the CT won't be too awful and that she can endure the whole day. Pray that God will watch over us and share His many blessings. We heard today that Nate is doing well and has made some new commitments to his Lord. We are so hopeful that he can find purpose and meaning in life. Steve must be better, with improving back since he has gone camping for the weekend with his guy friends, he hoped he would get better and it sounds like he did. Thanks for your prayers for both of these great guys.

Sending our love to each of you with grateful hearts.


tim and nan

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Tough day

Dear Ones,

This will be short tonight, its almost 11 and we have to be up and out before 8 in the morning for a 9:15 appointment with our oncologist in Concord. Nan has many questions to ask him about her present condition and possible solutions to some of the nausea and pain. She stunned me this evening by mentioning that she wonders if some of the intense pain in her lower back might be caused by a new tumor. Of course it is possible since they can grow very rapidly and her last CT scan was about 1 and 1/2 months ago in Boston. We had planned to return to Boston the end of this month for our first regular 2 months scan but in Nan's current condition a trip like that is out of the question. She is weak, has nausea, intense pain and there is no way she is getting on a plane for a 5 hour trip there. No way at all.

Today we have gone our own ways. We had the privilege of having Keanna this morning for awhile. We were so thrilled that Steve asked if she could come for a bit this morning while he inspected a house here. She comes in full of life and energy, what a kick to see her in action and she is sooooo good for Nan. While Nan had a bowl of cereal Keanna had grapes and dry Cherrios, colored in her book (she calls it work, got to go do my work now grammie), petted the kitties and ventured into our 4th bedroom which is piled high with suitcases and stuff from our trips, she made her way through and got a blanket, so cute she and grammie both had blankets over their legs as they sat in their respective chairs. Steve and Keanna headed for Hayward and another appraisal and I left for Livermore to see a home, then to Carmichael up Highway 5 and then down 80 to Davis to see the last one of the day. Car ran perfectly and gradually I am regaining my confidence in it.

I totally forgot to drive my Fiero over to Ron Samoians house last night so he could drive it to work this morning and try to sell it there. We could really use the money right now and its just an extra car. Nice one with leather, 76k miles, 88 which is the last year they made them but I don't need an extra sports car in the driveway at all. So Ron will take it in on monday instead. A neighbor wants to buy it but won't have funds for 3 weeks and I'd rather not wait.

Nan describes how she feels right now as low energy and almost out of it. She did a great job with her walk this morning and walks around the house pretty well. She did a strong job on her hair this evening and was not even winded afterwards. It came out looking very nice after she dried it. One of the visiting nurses called today to say the hematocrit was 24 which indicates Nan needs a blood transfusion. We counted it up and it has been nearly a month since her last one so thats not too bad. Usually a transfusion will give her a boost. However getting the blood found and then in takes forever in Concord. Not sure if it can happen tomorrow or on the weekend, we'll see.

I thanked Barb and Gerry again today for their help and they told me they might be able to come again soon for a couple days, that would be wonderful if it can work out. Today while I was gone Mary came to make a smoothie and brought lemon bars and some good pasta, thanks so much for your loving help Mary. Then when mary left Loree was kind enough to come and sit with Nan for awhile, that is so nice and helps the time pass. Loree has been our lifesaver for months and months, sometimes you can almost see the wings sprout but Scott, her husband, says no wings!

I hope Nan can get a good night of rest tonight, driving to Concord tomorrow will not be easy for her and we'll try to take it easy.

My prayer tonight for Nan is hold back the tumors, heal the nausea and back pain, build up strength and courage. Not asking for much. Why ask for less and we always want His will to be done. We are also praying for son Steve who hurt his back recently and is gradually working through it. He has had some sleepless nights lately with pain.

We are also praying for our friend Nate, that God will help him get on his feet soon and embrace life.

Thank you my friend for being there as a prayer pardner for Nan. We are deep in the woods again right now and long to see the clear skys again.


tim and nan